So the holidays past and still the ex is trying his very best to win me back. He took mase and I ice skating and out for pizza. He has been pulling out all the stops and I must admit a part of me wants it to work and the other wants him to give up. We both agreed throughout the 2 week period I was in town for Christmas we would be friends and do stuff together with the kids. That worked well for like 2 days then the questions about Hair Man began followed by jealousy, sadness, and of course ending with him trying to kiss me.

I cannot do that! If I am dating someone for 5 minutes of 5 years there still has to be a level of trust there. I cannot start this new relationship off on a bad foot, I told my ex NO! He did not like that very much but it had to happen.

So currently we are friends and I am still with Hair Man. I am happy and although the thought of fixing my family sounds like a dream that's all it is a dream, a fantasy. See because at the end of the day all the same problems are there, they are just being covered up by I love you's and I'm sorry's. That part of my life is over. I'm done with dreaming...well that's not exactly true I've just changes my dream a little. I'm no longer dreaming of a man that I want to change so I can have this perfect family that doesn't exist. Now my dreams are of a man that makes me laugh, smile, and adores my kids. So whether or not that man is Hair Man or someone I've never met I know in my heart he is out there.

Well I guess that's the end to that mini drama. My final decision.....give Hair Man a shot and to my ex I say "you live, you learn and then you get luv's" haha sorry that was a little diaper joke.

peace

Well 2009 is here and 2008 is over....Thank God! Not that me and 2008 didn't have some good times, we easily did. There was that time we.....hmmmm...thinking. So ok, a lot of bad shit happened in 08, I left my fiance, my home, my dog (i still miss Nelli) All in all 08 stung pretty bad, but it's not like me to dwell. I'm an extremely happy and positive person, for the most part, and I refuse to concentrate on 2008's flaws. So this blog is dedicated to all the good times in 08.


So here is my top ten list of 08's best:

10. Started this blog...awww! I have met so many amazing single parents through this blog and others I have stumbled across. Oh the power of the Internet!

9. I got a new tattoo, peace symbol behind my right ear. I also became a fiery redhead! So I guess you can say I was a bit daring in 08.

8. Along with # 9...after deciding to change my hair color a dramatic shade of pumpkin I met Hair Man. Need I say more. sigh

7. I became an Ambassador Of Peace

6. Moved to Charleston and started fresh

5. Coached the most amazing group of 5 year olds I've ever met. Not to mention our micro soccer team was undefeated. Go Battery! Not that I was keeping score or anything (it was the parents I swear)

4. My son scored his first goal. It was overwhelming and I was so incredibly proud of him. See winning is not something I have raised him to focus on and he is extremely selfless, which you do not see very often in a 5 yr old. Especially in sports where they all run towards the ball in a mad swarm. My son is like me, very clumsy and not the fastest on the team, so when he gets the ball he often loses it or passes it to a teammate. What makes this one even better he scored the last game of the season : )

3. My daughter took her first steps. She has had many milestones in 2008. Walking, talking, running, jumping, scratching, biting, you know all the major firsts this year.

2. I came to peace with myself. I often am too hard on myself and try to help everyone else, but this year I think I focused on helping myself a bit more. It was much needed.

And the # 1 greatest thing to happen in 2008 is.......drum roll please

Obama!!! Hell to the yeah. I voted, I waited in line, I prayed for change, and sure enough I witnessed it happen. But I wasn't alone, I was just one of millions who wanted this. We all came together to make a difference and through adversity we did it. 2009 is promising and as the eternal optimist that i am I think it's going to be a marvelous year.

So here's to 2009....low gas prices, better economy, better sex, and making a difference! Cheers.