So the holidays past and still the ex is trying his very best to win me back. He took mase and I ice skating and out for pizza. He has been pulling out all the stops and I must admit a part of me wants it to work and the other wants him to give up. We both agreed throughout the 2 week period I was in town for Christmas we would be friends and do stuff together with the kids. That worked well for like 2 days then the questions about Hair Man began followed by jealousy, sadness, and of course ending with him trying to kiss me.

I cannot do that! If I am dating someone for 5 minutes of 5 years there still has to be a level of trust there. I cannot start this new relationship off on a bad foot, I told my ex NO! He did not like that very much but it had to happen.

So currently we are friends and I am still with Hair Man. I am happy and although the thought of fixing my family sounds like a dream that's all it is a dream, a fantasy. See because at the end of the day all the same problems are there, they are just being covered up by I love you's and I'm sorry's. That part of my life is over. I'm done with dreaming...well that's not exactly true I've just changes my dream a little. I'm no longer dreaming of a man that I want to change so I can have this perfect family that doesn't exist. Now my dreams are of a man that makes me laugh, smile, and adores my kids. So whether or not that man is Hair Man or someone I've never met I know in my heart he is out there.

Well I guess that's the end to that mini drama. My final decision.....give Hair Man a shot and to my ex I say "you live, you learn and then you get luv's" haha sorry that was a little diaper joke.

peace